Tuesday, January 25, 2011

Expectation


There was a warm fire roaring in the wood stove. Glancing out my window, I saw stars gleaming in the sky like diamonds and knew that I couldn't just stay inside and pretend like they weren't there.

I smiled and thanked Jesus for the beautiful impracticality of stars. It was one of those nights where you realize that the stars are infinitely innumerable and feel incredibly small (because you are.) Suddenly I remembered a dream that I had forgotten all about from several weeks before.

I was standing under the same sky in my front yard, except there were more stars- the entire expanse of the sky was completely covered with them- and they were brighter than any stars I had ever seen. In my dream, I watched as the heavens parted open. When I awoke, Malachi 3:10 was repeating itself over and over in my mind:

"...see if I will not throw open the floodgates of heaven and pour out so much blessing that there will not be room enough to store it."

When I looked up the verse, though, I realized that my mind had left out a very important part: "Bring the whole tithe into the storehouse, that there may be food in my house. Test Me in this..."

I've met a lot of lukewarm Christians. They're always nice people with nice houses and nice things and nice kids and nice clothes and nice food and nice entertainment. They're relatively happy people who take nice vacations and have nice plans for retirement. They pray before dinner and go to church on Sundays. Every time I meet one of them I think, "Well, that's nice. Great for them..." 

"Jesus, don't let me be like that, okay?"  

Most people settle for lukewarm lives, and if that's what they want, that's fine. Usually it's what they're expecting, so I suppose they can't imagine anything different. Well, for some reason, Jesus has given Lindsey and I this passionate desire to pursue Him radically and leave everything else behind. We're extremely expectant for what He's going to do with our lives. We're both purposefully in positions right now to be completely and entirely open to Him and devoted to Him, and it's a beautiful, beautiful thing.

Part of that package is being expectant. I can't tell you how many times I've heard things like, "Someday you're going to look across the breakfast table and wonder if you married the right person," and, "It'll be different when you're older- just wait," and, "Some days it's going to feel like God has abandoned you."

Well, you know what? If that's what you're expecting, then that's probably what you're going to get. We have a beautiful Father who honors our expectations, and I'm sure He really appreciates it when we say things like that about Him. But I happen to believe the Bible, specifically the portion in Malachi where He asks me to be so expectant that He'll even open the floodgates of heaven on my behalf.

I have no idea what you need right now- perhaps it's something as specific as enough finances to pay your bills or something as vague as a peace that will fill a void in your heart- but Jesus is aching to do it for you.

Expect Him to.

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