Feeding the Flames

Some of the most frustrating times in my walk with Jesus have been the little valleys that seem to come right after we reach the mountaintops. This has always been a pattern in our relationship, and believe me when I say that it has absolutely nothing to do with Him- it's all on me.

One day I'll feel His presence so closely that I wonder why I've ever felt lonely or how I could possibly desire anything but His love. The sweetness of the hours that we spend together is unmatched, and I am completely and utterly at peace. Then a week later I'll feel almost dry and stale, as if He is in the next room and I'm not quite sure how to reach Him. Praying becomes more of a chore than a pleasure, and I feel distracted and cold when I try to spend time with Him.

I was feeling just this way at the beginning of this week, and for some reason I didn't want to admit it to Him, (as if He didn't already know,) so I sat at my piano and tried to sing to Him.

This just happened to be during our electricity-free pioneer escapade, and on this particular day I was named "Keeper of the Flame" and left in charge of our all-important wood-stove fire so that our pipes wouldn't freeze.

I kept forgetting about the fire and Jesus kept nudging me away from the piano and over to the wood-stove, where I'd poke the flames a little and add a log or two before sulking over to the piano again.

After quite a few rounds of this, I had just sat down to play when Jesus whispered, "You know, that's all you have to do."

"What? Hm?" I asked, knowing full well what He had said.

And since He knew full well that I knew full well what He had said He didn't say it again.

No matter how much wood you put on the fire, it's going to go out eventually if you don't add more. And more. And more. And more.

I can't rely on the occasional Bible-reading sessions, church services, and prayer times that I undergo if they are just that- occasional. Jesus never said, "Spend time in My presence occasionally." Instead, He advised Moses this way in Leviticus 24: "The lamps on the pure gold lampstand before the Lord must be tended continually." This is reminiscent of what Paul advised the Thessalonians in one of the shortest verses in the Bible: "pray continually."

How profound!

It is my desire to not live a life of mountaintops and valleys when it comes to my relationship with God- He is steadfast, therefore I ought to strive to be the same way. Case closed.